Nash Wins MVP! Stanley is New Nostradamus!
May 8th 2006 08:19
Well dear readers, the second round is amongst us and we have some killer match-ups that will send NBA fans into such
an orgasmic stratosphere you’d think you were shagging your fantasy sexual partner (Insert name here). We had the Spurs edging out the Mavericks 87-85, while the Pistons destroyed LeBron and the Cavs 113-86.
The big three for San Antonio had a great opening game for the series with Tim Duncan playing a superb all-round game with 31 points and 13 rebounds. While Dallas’ all-star, Dirk Nowitzki had a forgetful opening game going 8-20 from the field and scoring 20 points. In all fairness the big sauerkraut was hounded by that ‘defensive’ thug Bruce Bowen who played a type of “D” that coach Avery Johnson succinctly described as “bear hug defence” (Aron, AP, 2006).
All of my loyal fans and readers out there would surely be familiar with my disdain for the Spurs, but this series is going to be a very interesting and tight match-up. Any NBA fan out there would be bursting at the seams with this battle for Texas. However, I would also guess that everyone out there on earth would want a Dallas win – including players and fans of the San Antonio franchise! Yes, I know that is an oxymoron but lucid thought in relation to the Spurs is impossible with this writer.
In today’s other game we saw ‘Bron ‘Bron and the Cavs being annihilated by a championship calibre team. Wherever King James went on the court, there were a posse of Pistons ready to mug him. They played the man-child so tightly that there was probably a gang of players from the ‘D’ in the same toilet cubicle as James when he went to the can to do a poo-poo. The Pistons were so effective in shutting down James that in the second half the wunderkind was scoreless, while his teammates could not respond to the challenge presented to them.
On the other end of the court the men from Motown made 10 3-pointers in the first half to have Cleveland seeing stars. Opening up a massive first half lead that proved to be insurmountable for the Cavs.
The Pistons are a battle hardened unit and they are going to go gangbusters on the James gang. Chalk this up as a learning experience for ‘Bron ‘Bron, because he is going to have to be molested by the Pistons to such an extent that they could be legally seen as stalkers!
We also have the last two major individual awards being handed out today:
Ben Wallace – Defensive Player of the Year.
Steve Nash – Most Valuable Player.
Big Ben has now won the DPOY award for the fourth time in five years. The Beast is one scary dude in the paint, and it is little wonder that he has owned this award in recent years. The man eats weak shots for breakfast, lunch and tea!
Those crazy Canucks can celebrate bad ass white boy Steve Nash’s second consecutive MVP award by drinking down maple syrup and shooting each other in the face with hockey pucks. The floppy haired Canadian becomes the ninth player in league history to win back-to-back trophies, and becomes only the second point guard in history to win two MVP awards. The other player? Magic Johnson.
King James placed a distant second to Nash in the voting, but at the age of 21 there are more than a few years left for the chosen one to win a MVP trophy.
However, it’s all about Nash today and you can all once again dial-up my psychic hotline for more on-the-ball predictions.
The big three for San Antonio had a great opening game for the series with Tim Duncan playing a superb all-round game with 31 points and 13 rebounds. While Dallas’ all-star, Dirk Nowitzki had a forgetful opening game going 8-20 from the field and scoring 20 points. In all fairness the big sauerkraut was hounded by that ‘defensive’ thug Bruce Bowen who played a type of “D” that coach Avery Johnson succinctly described as “bear hug defence” (Aron, AP, 2006).
All of my loyal fans and readers out there would surely be familiar with my disdain for the Spurs, but this series is going to be a very interesting and tight match-up. Any NBA fan out there would be bursting at the seams with this battle for Texas. However, I would also guess that everyone out there on earth would want a Dallas win – including players and fans of the San Antonio franchise! Yes, I know that is an oxymoron but lucid thought in relation to the Spurs is impossible with this writer.
In today’s other game we saw ‘Bron ‘Bron and the Cavs being annihilated by a championship calibre team. Wherever King James went on the court, there were a posse of Pistons ready to mug him. They played the man-child so tightly that there was probably a gang of players from the ‘D’ in the same toilet cubicle as James when he went to the can to do a poo-poo. The Pistons were so effective in shutting down James that in the second half the wunderkind was scoreless, while his teammates could not respond to the challenge presented to them.
On the other end of the court the men from Motown made 10 3-pointers in the first half to have Cleveland seeing stars. Opening up a massive first half lead that proved to be insurmountable for the Cavs.
The Pistons are a battle hardened unit and they are going to go gangbusters on the James gang. Chalk this up as a learning experience for ‘Bron ‘Bron, because he is going to have to be molested by the Pistons to such an extent that they could be legally seen as stalkers!
We also have the last two major individual awards being handed out today:
Ben Wallace – Defensive Player of the Year.
Steve Nash – Most Valuable Player.
Big Ben has now won the DPOY award for the fourth time in five years. The Beast is one scary dude in the paint, and it is little wonder that he has owned this award in recent years. The man eats weak shots for breakfast, lunch and tea!
Those crazy Canucks can celebrate bad ass white boy Steve Nash’s second consecutive MVP award by drinking down maple syrup and shooting each other in the face with hockey pucks. The floppy haired Canadian becomes the ninth player in league history to win back-to-back trophies, and becomes only the second point guard in history to win two MVP awards. The other player? Magic Johnson.
King James placed a distant second to Nash in the voting, but at the age of 21 there are more than a few years left for the chosen one to win a MVP trophy.
However, it’s all about Nash today and you can all once again dial-up my psychic hotline for more on-the-ball predictions.
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Comment by Cibbuano
Hunt Famous
Orble Post of the Day
Fat Cult
Techbreak
Comment by Stanley
Comment by Cibbuano
Hunt Famous
Orble Post of the Day
Fat Cult
Techbreak
Comment by Stanley
Comment by Cibbuano
Hunt Famous
Orble Post of the Day
Fat Cult
Techbreak
you SO creepy!